Bedtime routine
She becomes talkative, resisting sleep with lullabies
With a twitch, her breath deepens, undulating like a rolling sea
I tip-toe out the door, she awakens with a cat’s meow
(I’m unsure if there are format restrictions for Sijo, but I’m tempted to use line breaks)
Bedtime routine
She becomes talkative
resisting sleep
with lullabies
With a twitch
her breath deepens
undulating like a rolling sea
I tip-toe out the door
she awakens
with a cat’s meow
What is Sijo? This is the first I have heard of it, so I will reference the dVerse post describing it. Sijo is a traditional Korean form, with a strong musical component. Sijo is composed in three lines, each line having 14-16 syllables, for a total count of between 44-46 syllables.
I’m not sure if I captured the requirements properly but had fun exploring a new form.
You’ve brought back many memories with this, Kat. So many times I tiptoed out of our babies’ rooms only to have them awaken. It became such a game to get them to sleep. I really like “her breath…undulating like a rolling sea.” You did great on this form. Next time we’ll both work on the half-line phrases and pauses (I just figured that out). Peace
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You are clever to figure this out, Jay. We’ll have to try this again. I think my haiku practice peeked through a little on this. It always takes time to fully appreciate a new form in its nuances. Many thanks…
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darn cat…waking the kids….ha….def brought back memories for me as well…our cat (died at christmas this year) thought she was our boys mama…she would go check on them every night…and watch over them at night…i rather like the line breaks..i am a suckker for form rebellion so…smiles.
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and welcome to dverse….smiles.
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Thanks, Brian, and sorry to hear about your cat. Sounds like lovely memories.
I guess I like *knowing* I can follow a form properly and then *choosing* to do it my way! That’s what makes it art, right? Haha…
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Wonderfully evoking that peaceful time… and the twist at the end of the tale is definitely worthy!
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I think that twist comes from my involvement with NaHaiWriMo. A little haiku juxtaposition slipped in at the end! Thanks for visiting and commenting, Samuel. I enjoyed learning about a new (to me) form.
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smiles…this took me back a few years…they always think they miss something when they fall asleep cause life’s just so exciting…smiles…a lovely pic as well..
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Thanks, Claudia. I remember those days of not wanting to miss all the fun the adults seemed to be having.
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In reading this, I felt the hush and then was woken too!
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So glad it was effective for you, Rowan. :) Thanks so much.
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..so cute… i can just stare at her infinitely… then read your words silently and smiling… lovey take… smiles..
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Many thanks, Kelvin. Babies are mesmerizing. She’s almost 3 years old now (and still mesmerizing). Thanks for your kind comment.
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Oh, I remember those days. I can’t wait for July… my sister-in-law is having a baby!!!
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Oh, how exciting, Laurie! Congrats to the family. I wrote so many poems in my head while nursing my girl. They are pure magic.
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I love those bedtime routines when my children were still young ~ I like watching for that moment when they sleep like the sea ~ Nice to meet you ~
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Nice to meet you too, Grace. I love the moment when they slip over into dreamland. They move non-stop all day that the change is abrupt. A favorite part of my day.
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Welcome to dVerse; this is quite an entry you’ve made. And it’s so true what you say. In the morning, if I creep around trying not to wake my wife, her eyes always open; if I crash about like an elephant in a sugar-cane plantation; she sleeps right through it :-)
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Thanks so much, Tony. Everyone has been so lovely and welcoming at dVerse. What a great group! I think I am like your wife in that regard – I notice when one of the kids is being too quiet but will sleep through a ruckus. :) Thanks for your kind comment.
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very sweet.. peace and tranquility .. the second line is just lovely.
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Thanks so much, Bjorn. I visited your site and see that you are a physicist. So nice to meet another scientist-poet; I am a biochemist. I think that science only deepens one’s wonderment of natural beauty.
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Welcome to Dverse.
That second line resonates strongly with the “cat meow” ending. Being around infants is something special.
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Hi Lila! Babies are indeed special and wonderful muses for poetry. :) Thanks for your kind comment.
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